Saying Goodnight

Saying goodbye to Bean each night was very difficult.  Friends of ours who'd had a premie frankly told us that they cried as they left their baby every time.  They are not super sentimental people either.  It is startling how fast you fall in love with a baby.  Right from the get-go Bean was an important part of the family, and it was heart wrenching to leave him, even though we knew he was in the best possible place for getting well.

August 22nd:

When Bean Comes Home...
I intend to rock him all through that first night. Just the two of us.

In the hospital, we rocked, nursed, and snuggled then I had to say goodnight and walk away. Not to complain, but this is very hard.

It was made even more challenging because we had two little ones still at home who needed their mother and father's attention as well.  

Jay wrote on August 24th:

Quick update

Bean does well on the Lantus, but at rounds yesterday they said they were taking him off of it to see how the glyburide (the sulfonylureas) affects him without the Lantus muddying the waters. This week's neonatologist (a new guy, not Dr. C) pointed out that even if the glyburide just reduces the amount of insulin he needs, it's still worth it.

He was up to 6 lb 5 oz.

Yesterday morning was the first time I've fed any of our newborns. Fay took the older kids for some Mommy Time so I went up with Grandma to see Bean and bottle-fed him. He was very alert afterwards, just looking around and chilling with me in the rocking chair. He fell asleep just before it was time to check his glucose again. At least at 11 he didn't need more insulin, so he just got a shallow poke. Then Grandma took a turn feeding him and he fell right asleep. In the evening, it was Fay's turn to go up.

Fay pointed out the other day that little Bean's already had far more needles in him in his two weeks of life than she has had in almost thirty. Poor kid.